We’ve all been there: you set a goal, make a plan, start strong… and then something gets in the way. Sometimes it’s obvious—procrastination, skipping steps, or abandoning your plan altogether. Other times it’s subtle, like saying “I’ll start fresh next week” or convincing yourself you’re too busy right now. That pattern has a name: self-sabotage.

The truth is, self-sabotage isn’t laziness or lack of discipline. It’s your brain trying to keep you safe. But safe often means stuck. The good news? There’s a simple technique you can use to break that cycle and create real momentum toward the life you want.

Why We Self-Sabotage

Before we dive into the technique, it helps to understand why self-sabotage shows up in the first place. At its core, it’s about fear and discomfort.

• Fear of failure: “What if I try and it doesn’t work out?”
• Fear of success: “What if I actually pull this off—then what?”
• Fear of change: “This feels uncomfortable, maybe I’m better off staying where I am.”

Your brain is wired to conserve energy and avoid risk. So when you try to push outside your comfort zone, your subconscious can step in and throw up roadblocks. That’s why you find yourself scrolling on your phone instead of tackling your to-do list, or raiding the fridge instead of writing that report.

Self-sabotage doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re human. But if you want to grow, you need a way to interrupt that pattern.

The Technique: “Name It, Frame It, Do One Small Thing”

Here’s a simple three-step method that helps stop self-sabotage in its tracks:

1. Name It

The first step is awareness. The moment you notice yourself stalling, doubting, or distracting, pause and literally name what’s happening.

• “I’m procrastinating right now.”
• “I’m talking myself out of doing this workout.”
• “I’m finding excuses instead of moving forward.”

By naming it, you shine a light on the pattern. It’s harder for sabotage to keep control when you call it out directly.

2. Frame It

Once you’ve named it, reframe the situation. Instead of letting sabotage sound like the final word, give it a different meaning.

Ask yourself: What’s really going on here? Maybe you’re tired and need a break. Maybe you’re scared of failing, which means the task actually matters to you. Framing shifts you out of autopilot and into curiosity.

For example:

• Instead of “I’m too lazy to write this report,” reframe it as “I’m nervous about getting it wrong, which means I care about doing it well.”
• Instead of “I’ll never stick with this routine,” reframe it as “It feels new and awkward right now, but that’s what learning looks like.”

Reframing turns self-sabotage into information you can work with, rather than a dead end.

3. Do One Small Thing

Here’s where momentum is built: you don’t need to leap the whole mountain, just take one small step.

Pick the tiniest, most doable action connected to your goal and do it immediately.

• If you’re avoiding exercise: put your trainers on.
• If you’re procrastinating on work: open the document and type one sentence.
• If you’re stress-eating: drink a glass of water first.

One small thing might not feel like much, but it flips the switch from inaction to action. And action breeds more action. Momentum starts small but grows quickly once you’re moving.

Why This Works

This technique works because it rewires the way your brain responds to self-sabotage.

• Naming interrupts the unconscious loop of avoidance.
• Framing reduces fear and creates a sense of choice.
• One small thing gives your brain a quick win, releasing dopamine—the chemical of motivation and progress.

Over time, this practice builds a new pattern: instead of spiralling into self-sabotage, you become someone who notices it, shifts perspective, and takes action anyway.

Putting It Into Practice

Here are some ways you can start using this technique today:

• Keep a notepad nearby and jot down when you notice yourself self-sabotaging. Naming it on paper makes it even clearer.
• Set a rule for yourself: if you catch the pattern, immediately find one small thing to do. No matter how tiny, it counts.
• Celebrate small wins. Each time you follow through, acknowledge it. You’re training your brain to associate action with reward.

Remember, you don’t have to be perfect. You just need to practice. The more often you catch sabotage in the act, the less power it has over you.

Final Thoughts

Self-sabotage isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign that you’re trying to grow. And growth always comes with resistance. But by learning to name it, frame it, and take one small step forward, you can turn sabotage into momentum.

The difference between staying stuck and moving forward often comes down to that single decision: will you let the pattern win, or will you take the smallest step anyway?

The choice is yours. And each time you choose action, you’re not just overcoming sabotage—you’re building the momentum that carries you toward the life you want.